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1 Thessalonians 2:7 - 12
Legacy Standard Bible

7 But we proved to be gentle among you, as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her own children. 8 In this way, having fond affection for you, we were pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God but also our own lives, because you had become beloved to us. 9 For you remember, brothers, our labor and hardship, how working night and day so as not to be a burden to any of you, we proclaimed to you the gospel of God. 10 You are witnesses, and so is God, of how devoutly and righteously and blamelessly we behaved toward you believers; 11 just as you know how we were exhorting and encouraging and bearing witness to each one of you as a father would his own children, 12 so that you would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory.

We come this morning in our study of Paul's letter to the church at Thessalonica to a stunning passage of scripture.  

You can all rest easy this morning because this sermon is directed at me.  This entire section is defining Paul's method of leadership, and thus it is a direct example of what the best leadership imagineable actually looks like.

You'll notice the first word in vs. 7 is "But".  That word is an "adversative".  It's a relay from what was previously said into what will be said next.  Those folks said this about me, BUT this is actually what you know to be the truth.

It's a connector.  And since it's there we need to know what Paul is connecting.  And last week we looked at what we called a polemic argument where Paul is answering accusations that have been made by his opponents, ultimately dupes of Satan himself, charges brought in opposition to Paul.  Discredit Paul by bringing charges.

We don't have the charges, but we can figure out what was being accused by what Paul says in his defense.  1 thess 2:

2b For you yourselves know, brothers, that our entrance to you was not in vain,  3 For our exhortation does not come from error or impurity or by way of deceit; 4 but just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not as pleasing men, but God who examines our hearts. 5 For we never came with a flattering word, as you know, nor with a pretext for greed⁠—God is witness⁠— 6 nor seeking glory from men, either from you or from others,

We can make a list;  Paul is an empty windbag of no worth or power who is bringing you errors.  He is impure and he's a liar.  He is a man pleaser, a flatterer with a desire motivated by greed and his ego for glory.

In other words, Paul is like every other huckster who ever showed up in town trying to separate you from your women and your money.  Paul is there to deceive you with lies and take anything of value from you that he can get.  And he's out for his own glory.

Those are pretty serious accusation.  The word "But" in vs. 7 is the adversative word that connects what his accusers say he was with what Paul actually is.

They say we are this  . . .  but  . . .  you yourselves know I was this.

And Paul is going to launch into his leadership method among them with two incredible metaphors.  I was a mother, and I was a father.  Let's look at how Paul conducted himself in the midst of these new believers at Thessalonica.

7 But we proved to be gentle among you, as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her own children.

Daycare is a necessary evil in our culture.  Over the course of my 70 years there has been an almost universal reversal in our culture.  When I was a little tiny guy it was highly unusual for mothers to work away from home.  It was uncommon and largely unaccepted.  

Now the opposite is true.  It's incredibly rare to find a mom who is committed to being a stay at home mom who is sole caregiver to her small children.  It's almost looked at as if someone who does that is weird.  

And yet anyone who studies the development of small children can tell you that kids who grow up at home with a mom as teacher and caregiver will out-thrive any of the other possibilities.  And that is by God's design.

God designed mothers to love and nurture small children.  And children who are lucky enough to have the love and security of a mom who sets boundaries early on and instructs with love and discipline, those children are happy and secure.  God did that.  Our culture is busily duped into un-doing everything that God put in motion.

Mothers and families, safety and security, enfolded in love, lovingly disciplined family units bring thriving.  We've dismantled that and we are paying the price of disoriented confused unhappy harmful society of people.

That image is Paul's metaphor for his leadership style with new believers.  But we almost have to take some time to explain what a mother is these days in order to make any real sense of what Paul is saying here.

A mother is the God given definition of loving care, loving discipline, boundaries lovingly set for safety and security and thriving.  That's what a mother is, by God's design.  And that was Paul's approach to new believers.

7 But we proved to be gentle among you, as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her own children.

No day care worker, no matter how good, can give the same gentleness and loving care to a child as the mother who bore the children.  Paul says you were as precious to us as nursing babes are to the mother who brought them into the world.  Tenderness.  Gentleness.  Care on a level of a mother and child.

This is leadership that causes thriving.  Leadership 101 according to Paul.  Tenderness and gentleness and loving care like a mother and nursing babe.

8 In this way, having fond affection for you, we were pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God but also our own lives, because you had become beloved to us.

Same metaphor.  When a mother is nursing a baby, there's much more going on than that baby getting life giving nutrients.  There is a bond of love and affection that is greater than almost any other human bond.  

Paul was accused of only taking, but this metaphor is one of only love and giving.  Mother's don't get much in return for their gentleness and selfless love.  Temper tantrums.  Crying.  Poopy diapers.  We don't want to push the metaphor too far, but that's what Paul is saying.  

Paul wasn't there to take, he was there to give, and in the process, Paul and Silas and Timothy gave their hearts of love and affection to these new-born spiritual babes.  They gave them the gospel, but they also gave these new christians their very hearts. This is by example, deep affection.  

9 For you remember, brothers, our labor and hardship, how working night and day so as not to be a burden to any of you, we proclaimed to you the gospel of God.

With newborn babies, mom's are "ON CALL" 24-7.  Likewise Paul labored night and day on behalf of these new christians so that he would be no burden to them.

Paul was a tent maker.  He crafted tents out of animal skins.  He uses the analogy of cutting the skins straight so that there is no waste when he describes the meticulous careful work of biblical interpretation.  

In this case, Paul was in the midst of these new believers teaching them as much as they could take in, while spending the night hours making a living creating tents.  He literally worked night and day so he could give the gospel free of charge.

His accusers said he was after their money, Paul says he worked night and day to give the gospel of God for free and not take anything from them.  His accusers said he was after their love, flattering them to gain favors, sexual and otherwise, and Paul says no, it's the other way around, I was a mother giving of herself expecting nothing in return.

He says;  We paid our own way so we could give freely requiring nothing in return.  

Then in vss. 10 - 12 Paul switches the metaphor from mother to father.  Kids who thrive best get something from both mom's and dad's that they need to be complete thriving growing ever more useful persons.

Paul was a tender mother and also he is a spiritual dad.

10 You are witnesses, and so is God, of how devoutly and righteously and blamelessly we behaved toward you believers;

Part of the accusation Paul is doing combat against includes the word for impurity, akatharsias.  3 For our exhortation does not come from error or impurity or by way of deceit;

We all know in our modern world how damaging accusations of impurity are in the church.  These days it's like a non-stop circus of accusations of immorality.  

Paul uses three terms here to remind the Thessalonians of how he behaved while in their midst.  The exact opposite of his accusers accusations.

devoutly is from  hosiós  (hos-ee-oce')  it meant; piously, holiness of life, religiously.  Godly.  Next is the word translated

righteously;  dikaiós (dik-ah'-yoce)  it meant righteously, justly  It's a courtroom word.  A just, righteous, not guilty person.  This word has the idea of God pronouncing someone just.  Approved by God.  And then the word tranlated

blamelessly;   amemptós  (am-emp'-toce)  It meant blamelessly.  Without blame.  Accuse all you want, there is nothing of blame to report.  Paul was blameless, righteous, and Godly while he was among them.

Those three words apply equally to mothers and fathers.  But in vs. 11 Paul switches the metaphor to a father.

11 just as you know how we were exhorting and encouraging and bearing witness to each one of you as a father would his own children,

Again, with all of the confusion of our culture, we need to take time to define what a father is.  What does a father bring to the equation.

We are being taught almost non-stop these days that masculinity is something toxic.  Something to work hard not to be.  Satan is destroying families, Satan is destroying the beauty of lovely femininity.  And Satan is destroying masculinity.  Manliness is toxic.  

Masculinity without godly restraints and the laws in this book is in fact quickly toxic.  And since God and His book are dead, that's all the culture has left, is toxic masculinity.  Hard to argue the point.  

Devoid of God and His authority to reign, and His commandments that correspond to His intended design, families are dysfunctional, women are leaving their estate and becoming masculine and men are emasculated and becoming feminine.  All of it is toxic.

And our culture applauds and encourages anyone who abandon's God's intents and restraints.  The farther you can get from God's design, the more heroic you are in your rebellion against and hatred of God.  Our culture says paternity is toxic.  But families with strong fathers as heads is God's design for thriving.

In our current culture saying I treated you as a father would his own children is not even a positive statement.  Again we have to get back to Paul's context of what a jewish father according to the constraints of the old testament law ideally would have looked like.  Because today's fathers are doing toxic things to children.  Abandonment, abuse, absentee, and who knows what else in our culture.

Let's look for a moment at old testament masculinity that was closer to the restraints of God's intended design.  

Jesus himself quotes Genesis 2:24 and oh-by-the-way He takes a very literal view of a literal creation with a literal first man Adam and first woman made for Adam, Eve and Jesus quotes the pre-fall conditions designed by God;

Mt. 19:4 Jesus answered, “Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ 5 and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”

Jesus teaches us how to read and interpret scripture.  He takes the literalist view that the words combine to make sense and they simply mean what they say.

God designed men.  God designed women.  God designed that when boys become men they choose a wife, they leave their family unit of mother and father and they cleave to a wife and children happen and a new immediate family unit is formed.

The man is the head of the family.  The man provides protection and security and love for his wife and children.  The women is a mother.  She nurtures and loves and protects and cares for the children differently but in partnership with the man.  

And God designed men to be different from women.  Maculinity working within God's intended design is a beautiful thing.  Men were designed to be the protectors of daughters until a suitable godly man came along and took the daughter from under the father's protection and then becomes a husband providing protection and security.  God designed different roles for men and women.

Pam and I have thrived and our children have thrived because we understood just the most basic of these God designed roles and honored them.  Thriving just accompanies anyone who lives within the restraints of God's design.  You don't have to be a christian to obey God's design.  Any who do live within God's design constraints will thrive at some level, christian or not.  That principal was why our nation once thrived.  Godly influence brought thriving.

Before we get to Paul's spiritual fatherhood at Thessalonica, let's talk about the old testament understanding of men.  And we find it over and over in the old testament.  Be strong and courageous.

In  Joshua 1:9 NIV we have the keys to masculine strength.  The children of Israel were about to take their inheritance, about to go into the promised land.

    9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

Godly masculinity.  Godly strength and courage doesn't come from the man alone, separated from God.  Strength and courage is given to men, by God, when they are righteously undertaking the will of God for the glory of God.

Over and over we read be strong and courageous, but it's never disconnected from "the Lord will be with you."  Strong masculinity and courage is only non toxic when it is combined with God's righteousness accomplishing God's desires for God's glory.

But when God is in masculinity, it's a beautiful thing.  And strength and courage don't have to be connected with the calamity of holy endeavors, it is present every day that a dad is acting as provider and protector and security over his wife and his family.  Those are God's design, and God is with any man who embraces God's design of cleaving to a wife and protecting a family unit.  

I can't help but go to one of my favorite passages of manly strength.  King David warring on two fronts, Ammon and Syria.  Joab is his general running the battle fronts.  Listen to a little Godly masculinity of strength and courage in action.  This is from 2 Sam. 10:

9 When Joab saw that the front of the battle was against him before and behind, he chose of all the choice men of Israel, and put them in array against the Syrians: 10 And the rest of the people he delivered into the hand of Abishai his brother, that he might put them in array against the children of Ammon. 11 And he said, If the Syrians be too strong for me, then thou shalt help me: but if the children of Ammon be too strong for thee, then I will come and help thee. 12 Be of good courage, and let us play the men for our people, and for the cities of our God: and the LORD do that which seemeth him good. 13 And Joab drew nigh, and the people that were with him, unto the battle against the Syrians: and they fled before him. 14 And when the children of Ammon saw that the Syrians were fled, then fled they also before Abishai, and entered into the city. So Joab returned from the children of Ammon, and came to Jerusalem.

12 Be of good courage, and let us play the man for our people, and for the cities of our God: and the LORD do that which seemeth good to Him.

Does that seem toxic to you, that courageous men would charge into battle fearlessly to protect the people of God and the cities of God with their only hope built upon God doing what seems good to Him.

Beloved, well over half of the population of our land would read that passage and say this God is toxic.  This view of manhood is toxic.  This God and His created manhood need to be emasculated or better yet dismissed.  God needs to go.  Men need to go.  Paternity needs to go.  Family restraints need to go.  All restraints need to go.  Get rid of this God and this book and anyone who thinks anything in this book is positive.  All of it has to go.

And the Psalmist says;  Psalms 2:

1 Why do the nations rage
And the peoples meditate on a vain thing?

2  The kings of the earth take their stand
And the rulers take counsel together
Against Yahweh and against His Anointed, saying,

3  “Let us tear their fetters apart
And cast away their cords from us!”
 
4  He who sits in the heavens laughs,
The Lord mocks them.
 
We are in an unseen spiritual battle.  The sides are drawing up in spiritual array for the final conflict between a fallen rebellious sinful planet and Yahweh.  

Paul says we need to be spiritual leaders in this battle who follow Paul's pattern of leadership.  

That means we love and nurture with the affection of a nursing mother, but we likewise possess that manliness of a father protecting his family and instilling strength and courage into the spiritual children and young men and women gaining strength and power for undertaking spiritually adult roles.

Mothers tend to surround and protect.  Fathers tend to take their children and put them increasingly in harms way in order to help them form courage and strength.  Both roles are beautiful and necessary.

Fathers are also the ones who discipline children.  Also necessary in a fallen world.  We are in a spiritual war and Godly leaders work as mother and father to cause spiritual babies to grow and thrive and become what the apostle John called young men.

Let's read through the natural progression of spiritual life of those who are saved, those who are called out of this world to belong to God.  1 John 2:

12 I am writing to you, little children, because your sins have been forgiven you for His name’s sake. 13 I am writing to you, fathers, because you have known Him who has been from the beginning. I am writing to you, young men, because you have overcome the evil one. I have written to you, children, because you have known the Father. 14 I have written to you, fathers, because you have known Him who has been from the beginning. I have written to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one.

The role of leadership, exhibited by Paul, for us to copy, is at the end of verse 14 in John's letter.  Godly leaders are both mother and father so that young men and women will be formed who are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one.

Paul says, I have become all things to all men.  As a spiritual leader you're a mother one minute to one kid that needs that and you're a father the next minute to some kid that needs that, and sometimes you need to get out the spanking stick and be the disciplinarian to kids that want to be wayward.

OK, with all of that background,  necessary in our insane culture, we return to Paul's statement in vs. 11;

11 just as you know how we were exhorting and encouraging and bearing witness to each one of you as a father would his own children,

Fathers exhort and encourage their children.  Father's authoritatively bear witness to children, teach children.

We've been watching a Netflix series called Heartland.  And maybe an illustration is possible taken from that series.  It's a ranch family of multiple generations but they have a little saying that is illustrative of what Paul is talking about here that fathers bring to children.  Cowboy up.

Yeah, you're face down in the dirt, the horse threw you off, the mom is trying to cuddle and protect but the dad or grandad is saying, quit whining about it, dust yourself off, and cowboy up.  Get back on the horse.  Try again.

Dad's have a role to play encouraging kids to get out of their comfort zone and fight back against the challenges this world throws at you.  Cowboy up is a nearly perfect phrase.  It's about what's left in our modern world of be strong and courageous.

In the spiritual dad role Paul is telling some of the Thessalonian christians, it's time to cowboy up and get to work.  The world is going to charge at you like a mad bull in the arena.  The world is going to buck you off and come back to try to stomp you.  

At some point, we all need a strong dad that's been stomped a few times himself who tells you cowboy up.  That won't be your last ride.  Get back on the bronc and you'll last a few seconds longer next time.

Let's look at the three defining words in vs. 11 where Paul is in the dad role;

exhorting and encouraging and bearing witness

exhorting  parakalountes  translated exhorting  (b) I beseech, entreat, beg, (c) I exhort, admonish, (d) I comfort, encourage, console.  This is a dad, running along beside the little bicycle after he just took the training wheels off, telling the kid, you're doing great!  You can do this!  You've got this!  But if the kid takes a header he's still there to pick them up and console a bit and help them get back on.

comforting  paramythoumenoi  comforting  I encourage, comfort, console, exhort.  (derived from 3844 /pará, "to come along side" and mytheomai, "soothing speaking") – properly, comforting that shows sympathy (encouragement), cheering someone up by soothing speech with a "personal touch."

charging  martyromenoi  charging  This is to charge someone with the authority of God.  Like a father who assumes authority and charges his children to obey his commands, Paul charges his spiritual children to become godly.  This is the general giving orders.  

All of those words have different levels and strategies to guide children into adulthood.  Sometimes we run along side and coach and cajole.  Sometimes we pick the kid up and dust him off and sympathize.  And sometimes we charge the kid with authority to keep moving in the desired direction, or else.

That's what good dads do, and that is the pattern for spiritual leadership to take newborn spiritual babies and bring them to spiritual adulthood.  Why?  Why is this important?  Why did Paul work through sleepless nights being a mom and a dad for a bunch of whiny spiritual babies?

Galatians 4:19 gives us the answer.  
19 My little children, with whom I am again in labor until Christ is formed in you⁠—

Paul is laboring with his own children, these new believers who he compares to the trust a mother or father would have with their own children, and like good parents, Paul is working to mold Christ in their lives.  

Paul uses a sculptural word.  formed.  morphōthē   It's the word a sculpturist would use to describe the action of molding some form out of clay.  Paul is working hard to mold these new believers into Christ likeness.  

Only God's word can effect that change.  And so Paul is teaching these new christians the oracles of God, the scriptures, the full council of God so that God's word can change them from the inside out into conformity with Jesus.

12 so that you would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory.

Again, the unpopular idea of election.  If you are in fact a true christian, it is because God has called you out of this world and into His kingdom.  God has called you out of the kingdom of Satan, the authority to reign of Satan in this world.  You have left this cosmos, this world system, ruled by Satan, behind, and you have stepped into and under the authority to reign of God, the Kingdom of God.

Ordering things theologically, thinking theologically, we often refer to positional truth and practical truth.  Positionally I might be fourth in line to the throne of England.  But practically I might be so morally bankrupt that my position and my actuality are completely at odds.

There is a sense in which to some extent that describes all christians.  Positionally I am a son of God and a co-heir with the risen Jesus.  That's a lofty lofty position.  God has purchased me and made me higher than any royalty on this planet.  That's my position.

But practically, my flesh is still very fallen, and there are times when anyone would question the reality of the claim of my position.  Luckily for me, it was Jesus who purchased me and called me out of this world, and regenerated me by His indwelling Holy Spirit.  The positional truth is sealed and protected in heaven.  Positional truth.  

But . . . pass me out on hwy 95 and then pull in front and drive at a slower speed than my cruise control was set at when you passed me, and see how I act.  It's disgraceful.

Those times when my flesh overpowers and I act disgracefully and dishonor my heavenly Father who purchased me with the shed blood of His only Son do not alter the positional truth of the inheritance gaurded in heaven for me.

But you can certainly understand what Paul is saying here to the Thessalonians.  

we were exhorting and encouraging and bearing witness to each one of you as a father would his own children, 12 so that you would walk in a manner worthy of the God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory.

Paul says we come along side you, like a mother, or a father, and we reprove, rebuke, exhort so that Christ will be formed in you, and you will walk in a manner worthy of who you are.  

We are to walk in this world as though we are citizens of another world.  And that's who we are.  We have been called out of this world, into God's world, and we need to walk in conformity to a different world.  

WWJD  What Would Jesus Do was a popular phrase 20 years ago and it eventually go all perverted by the world, like every other good phrase well meaning christians come up with.  

That aside, it's exactly what Paul is describing here.  Walking worthy in this world is being immersed in this book so that what Jesus would do is fresh in your minds.  That's why I've probably been out of balance in this group with studying the synoptic gospels as opposed to the epistles.

Paul was acting like Jesus would act.  He was the fatherly and motherly example to these christians of what Jesus would do and look like in all situations.  Walking worthy of who we are means we are immersed in this book so that we know what Jesus or Paul would do in tough situations.

We don't walk like this world walks.  We walk according to our citizenship in another world.  A heavenly Godly world where God reigns.